Thursday, July 1, 2010

I really did cry watching it

Yesterday I took my son and two of his buddies to watch Toy Story 3. I had heard it was awesome and amazing and that my kids would love it. But I am positive that I loved it just as much, if not more, than the kids did.

Particularly hard to watch was when Andy's mom says goodbye to her son as he's leaving home to go off to college. She stands in his empty room, everything now packed up in boxes. She places her hand on her chest, the tears start forming, and all of a sudden I'm crying with her. And I look back at the kids in the row behind us. Three brother's, I'm sure, as they all look alike and than I look over at their mom. She's staring at her boys and I'm glad to see I'm not the only one crying.

Being home with toddlers, the thought of either one of my babes ever being old enough to even consider leaving home is unfathomable. But let me be clear, I do think about that day often. Most of the time in a sad, "Please never leave me kids!" way. But also, I think about it when I'm stressed and tired. And overwhelmed and in tears in the laundry room just because the pile of clothes that needs washed and dried and folded and put away just seems to be insurmountable. And the kids need fed. And John won't be home for hours. Oh and the toilets need scrubbed. ASAP. Which is exactly what happened about two weeks ago. Really, I did that. It's funny now, actually. Picture me, bent over the washing machine, crying and hugging a pile of clothes.
Yeah, it's funny now.

But than I see a movie like Toy Story 3. And I'm crying at the thought of my birdies flying away from home one day. And while having that little moment with Andy's mom, my four year old son looked over at me, hugged me, and gave me a besito (kiss). And it's like he knew. He knew that one day he would also be older and go off to college or to live his life away from home. And he knew mommy was also thinking the same thing and that thinking that made me really sad.

And of course, I really started crying after that. But I composed myself, hugged my first born
back, and decided that there's a long time before now and than. And I promised to never think about my kids leaving home in a good or bad way. I just want to live in the now. Enjoy my babies.

Even the next time I end up crying in the laundry room over big piles of clothes and dirty toilets and hungry kids, I plan to laugh and enjoy the moment.

Well, when I'm done crying, that is.

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